94 year old woman to give birth (sort of)

http://www.nydailynews.com/gossip/2011/04/14/2011-04-14_zsa_zsa_gabor_94_to_have_baby_via_surrogate_claims_husband_frederic_prinz_von_an.html


Anyone who knows me knows I'm not an age discriminator. I love old people. I love my grandparents, I love the old ladies in the "Life Alert" commercials, I love Mr. Rogers from Mr. Rogers Neighborhood (or, I guess I loved Mr. Rogers since he, like so many old people before him, has passed away). The point is I enjoy senior citizens and I fully believe that they are still entitled to all of the rights they were given by the constitution because freedom has no age limit. Procreation, however, does. Or at least I think it should. Apparently Zsa Zsa Gabor, 94, doesn't seem to agree with me as recent reports have been saying that she and her 67 year old German husband are trying to have a baby (via surrogate, of course, but still). Now, this is wrong for several reasons. And by several, I mean a million. But for now I'll just list a few.
1. Biologically- The average age of a woman undergoing the process of menopause and thus losing the ability to naturally give birth is 51. Frankly speaking, Zsa Zsa Gabor is too old. About 43 years too old. The average age of a woman giving birth for the first time is 25 which means Zsa Zsa missed that cut by 69 years.

2. It's not fair to the child- When her child starts preschool she'll be about 98. When he or she starts high school, she'll be 108. When he or she graduates from college she'll be 116 which incidentally is two years older than the current oldest man in the world so...

3. She's way too old (have I mentioned that?)- When Zsa Zsa Gabor was born, Woodrow Wilson was President. The first World War was just ending. The NHL was just forming. Zsa Zsa Gabor is so old, her Bible is autographed. (That last one was just a yo mama joke I heard the other day but one that her son/daughter will likely hear for the rest of their life)

In order to make this nonsense happen Zsa Zsa and her husband are planning on using a surrogate, some frozen eggs and donated sperm so good luck explaining to your 5 year old son where babies come from. And why you're 70 years older than all his friends' moms.